Overwhelmed
From the movie: 10 Things I Hate about You:
Chastity : I know you can be overwhelmed, and you can be underwhelmed, but can you ever just be whelmed?
Bianca : I think you can in Europe.
Whelm:
to turn (something, such as a dish or vessel) upside down usually to cover something : cover or engulf completely with usually disastrous effect
to overcome in thought or feeling : OVERWHELM “whelmed with a rush of joy”— G. A. Wagner
to pass or go over something so as to bury or submerge it
Synonyms- crush, devastate, floor, grind (down), oppress, overcome, overmaster, overpower, overwhelm, prostrate, snow under, swamp
Underwhelmed: verb HUMOROUS:
past tense: underwhelmed; past participle: underwhelmed fail to impress or make a positive impact on (someone); disappoint. "American voters seem underwhelmed by the choices for president."
Underwhelmed began as a sarcastic comment about not feeling overly excited or overjoyed.
Overwhelmed: verb (used with object):
to overcome completely in mind or feeling: overwhelmed by remorse.
to overpower or overcome, especially with superior forces; destroy; crush: Roman troops were overwhelmed by barbarians.
to cover or bury beneath a mass of something, as floodwaters, debris, or an avalanche; submerge: Lava from erupting Vesuvius overwhelmed the city of Pompeii.
to load, heap, treat, or address with an overpowering or excessive amount of anything: a child overwhelmed with presents;
to overwhelm someone with questions.
to overthrow.
I don’t know about you but lately I am feeling whelmed and overwhelmed. It is if ALL of those definitions apply to me and my feelings and can be related to COVID-19. The pathetic thing is that I feel this way even though I am not suffering from COVID nor do I have any immediate family or friends that are. In fact, the pandemic hasn’t really impacted our lives too much. Sure, we have had to cancel trips and family gatherings and it is heartbreaking and upsetting that we cannot see my mother-in-law. But compared to many people, we are virtually unscathed. Yet, everything about this pandemic is overwhelming me- the news coverage, the changing dynamics of reports, responses and policies, the reaction of friends and family, the new “normal” of shopping, walking the dog and general interacting ( or not) with others, the planning, replanning, planning again based on new governmental guidelines.
I want to say ENOUGH already. Like most things in life, ENOUGH comes through the insignificant, immaterial and shallow items of life: it is the straw that breaks the camel’s back. Those little annoyances that drive us crazy. Recently for me, it was a certain fragrant candle that I like and was hoping to purchase. It reminds me of our beach home and is one I associate with hunkering down and writing. It is part of my ritual. Alas, I cannot get the candle in any store nearby. It used to be plentiful but for some reason- the manufacture is either putting those soy candle resources into something else, the factory is shut down, or everyone else is burning candles like I am- even the manufacturer’s website is “out of stock”.
Just like the cleaning products that are still scarce. As one of the check out gals remarked to me as we were talking about staying safe and cleaning during the pandemic, “Didn’t these people ever clean before?” Being cleaning fanatics, we couldn’t understand why the items would fly off the shelf now? If you were regularly cleaning, it wouldn’t be that much more of investment of items or time to keep things “pandemicly” clean. As she said, “Do they really need to be reminded to wash their hands? If so, what were (or were not) they doing before?”
I now realize how much I expect that when I go to the store, I can get whatever is on my list. Before, I never gave it much thought that what I “needed” would not be available. At the beginning of the pandemic, I understood and accepted the limitations of supplies. It is just hard to still experience those limitations five almost six months into the pandemic when we are supposedly returning to “normal”. It isn’t as if I have any exotic item on my list. Having rations and limits to resources is something with which I, and I suspect most Americans, are not familiar.
As I have reminded others, I need to remind myself- this too shall pass. When we are in the middle of a situation it is hard to see any perspective. Kind of like having your nose pressed up against an elephant’s backside- hard to know exactly where you are, what you are experiencing and when it will end? (Not that I have had first hand experience in elephant smooshing… but you get the picture.)
I have been reading lots of different books during this COVID time. Subconsciously it seems as if my common denominator with both fiction and non-fiction books are ones that take place either during WWI or WWII. In one of the books (Jacqueline Winspear, The American Agent: A Maisie Dobbs Novel- I highly recommend the Maisie Dobbs series!) the characters experience the London Blitz. For fifty-seven consecutive nights they experienced the pounding of the Luftwaffe. Beginning on the night of September 7, 1940 German airstrikes attacked the city. After those consecutive nights, Londoners were still susceptible to bomb attacks and would be until May 1941. That is a long time to be anxious and fearful that you might lose your shelter, employment and loved ones each and every night.
Recently I heard a quote from the ABC News anchor, Robin Roberts in speaking to my favorite singer/songwriter who underwent heart surgery this summer: “Make your mess your message.” She was asking, what is it that interviewee learned from her experience? How can that help others?
I am thinking of this mess that we call living in the time of COVID-19. What is it that you are learning? About yourself? About others? About life?
I am learning that when I feel overwhelmed I need to take a step back and slow down. My husband has been reading various articles from an African philosopher. There is an African proverb- when situation is urgent, we must slow down. I think that is good advice for this rapidly spinning chaotic atmosphere in which we find ourselves. I find that I need to ensure that I have time to step back, reflect and regroup- to not feel overwhelmed by an engulfing tide of COVID information or the swirling current of fear.
I am also using this time of change, of rations, and of waiting for items to come into the store as opportunities to be grateful and for prayer: to be grateful that I am able to purchase things, even if I have to wait. It is a good reminder that many people in the world do not have what they need, much less want. To pray and think of others who are less fortunate. I also am trying to think of creative ways to help those who might be in need- whether that is supporting local businesses or sharing resources with charitable organizations.
In our small group we are reading the book, Dangerous Prayers by Craig Groeschel. One thing that Groeschel suggests is that when we are going through a tough time, that is the best time to reach out to God and to reach out to others. So, while I need a hunkering down, slower pace in my schedule, I also need to balance that with reaching out and serving beyond myself. I think of Paul’s letter to the Philippians, “Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.” (Philippians 2: 4)
The problem with the word whelm, overwhelmed or underwhelmed is that they focus on the extremes. and there really is not room for extremes in our lives. Especially during difficult times. We need to demonstrate balance. When life is messy, our message should be to carry on- to step back, regroup and rearrange our priorities, time, resources that is balanced between caring for ourselves and for others.
What about you? Are you overwhelmed? Underwhelmed? Whelmed? What do you do to respond to it?
I liken the extreme feeling of being overwhelmed to a giant wave ready to engulf and swamp me. But, as I have mentioned before, I have found that the best way to combat the pounding waves is to ride them into shore or dive into the middle. Both might require a bold initial step or movement but once there, calmness can be found.
**Thank you for the prayers regarding my eyes. Still about the same- talk about Paul’s analogy of looking through a glass dimly. I am living Paul’s metaphor as I wait for this detachment to occur. I am sure that there are lessons/blog posts in this experience! While it is quite annoying that I do not have clear vision, I am grateful that I still can see, do not have any pain or headaches and that this too shall pass.