It Is Well

Recently I was asked to give a devotional for a group of women. They were exploring the idea of wellness in body, mind and spirit and wanted to use the old hymn, “It is Well with My Soul” as the theme for the day. It made me think, how does one say “it is well with my soul” when life doesn’t necessarily provide an environment conducive to that? For many of us, things are so far from being well in our soul. We are anxious, upset, hurt, broken, or troubled. There is no peace. Or as I say to my husband, some days “there is no joy in Mudville.”

There are certain mysteries of life. One is how, through God we can say that we have the peace that passes all understanding. I think that when we realize that we are fearfully and wonderfully made and that God loves us (and likes us) unconditionally, we can begin to put life into perspective. When we realize that we have eternal life with God, our temporal life on earth doesn’t require as much angst.

Certainly that doesn’t mean that we become anesthetized to the tragedies and difficulties of life. Far from it. But I think when we recognize Who is in control, that He is the one who created all, we can then adjust our attitude and thinking and take a longer view of what is and is not important.

The writer of the hymn “It is Well with My Soul” seemed to understand that. He was no stranger to tragedy.

Horatio and Anna Spafford

Horatio and Anna Spafford

Horatio Spafford was a prominent lawyer and business man in Chicago during the mid to late 1800’s. In 1871, he and his wife Anna were living with their four young daughters in Lake View, Chicago when the Chicago fire occurred. Even though Horatio lost money in a property investment deal due to the fire, they were grateful to have survived with their home intact. For the next two years they helped others in the recovery of the city.

In the winter of 1873, the family decided to take a respite and go to Europe with friends. At the last minute, Horatio was detained on business with the plan on meeting the family as soon as he could. Anna and their four daughters set sail on the Ville du Havre. Four days into their journey, the steamship was struck by another boat in the middle of the night. Within twelve minutes the steamship sank. Only 27 of the approximate 300 passengers survived. Anna was one having been found unconscious floating on a piece of debris. Tragically all four of their daughters drowned.

When Anna arrived ashore she sent a telegram to Horatio, “Saved alone. What shall I do?” Anna was bereft but she had a strong conviction that she was saved for a purpose.

Horatio set sail on the next ship. When they boat came to the approximate location and latitude that the Ville du Havre sank, the Captain called Horatio to the deck. After standing on that deck, he penned the words to the hymn.

The Spaffords returned home and in time had two more children, Bertha and little Horatio. Sadly, little Horatio died of Scarlet Fever when he was three years old. After the birth of their last child (Grace), the Spaffords with some friends decided to move to Jerusalem. Over time, the small group become known as the “American Colony”.

Just as they had done in Chicago, they befriended their neighbors in need regardless of ethnicity, race or religion. During WWI, the colony nursed wounded soldiers on both sides of the conflict. When needs arose with orphaned children, the Spafford Children’s Hospital came into being, which is still running today.

From one family’s tragedy arose help and good work for others.

I find it incredible that a family who lost 5 of their 7 children could still have empathy for others and that they would and could reach out to others. I think I would’ve just shut down. It seems to me that in order to be empathetic there must’ve been some peace in their lives. Some reconciliation of their new reality.

What gave them peace? How did they accept the situation that befell their family? (or did they?) By their actions and lifestyle, they continually reached out to others. Was it realizing that there is a bigger plan of life than just what affects them? Whether they felt it or not, they demonstrated obedience, purpose and trust. They felt God calling them to a new venture and so they went.

There are conflicting accounts of the Spafford’s true reasons for moving to Jerusalem yet I don’t find the differing opinions taint my regard of the story. If we examine ourselves, we would admit that each of us is inconsistent in our behavior and thoughts. Our reasons for doing something can be quite complex. Whatever reason they had for moving to Jerusalem and whatever interpretation of their behavior, one cannot argue that they gave back to the community regardless of their circumstances.

I think Anna’s feeling of a purpose helped her. In reading Bertha Spafford’s account of the family’s life, she describes her mother as taking to heart the advice from Evangelist Dwight L. Moody to get involved helping others. Anna did just that even though she grieved for her children her entire life. Bertha mentions in her book, Our Jerusalem, that her mother was quite affected from the drowning of the girls- Anna could never touch corduroy as that was the material of the sleeve of her one daughter as Anna grasped in the dark sea to grab her.

I think purpose helps keep us afloat. My limited life experience has shown that purpose brings depth and understanding to our lives. It gives meaning to situations that on the surface may seem meaningless.

A prayer at Anna’s funeral seems to sum up what the family realized in their hearts: “Life is eternal and love is immortal; And death is only a horizon; And a horizon is nothing; Save the limit of our sight.”

I hope and pray that if I ever have such a life experience as the Spaffords, that I can say “It is well with my soul.” I pray that I can look beyond the immediate and see purpose. I pray that I can trust in Him who suffered and died so that I wouldn’t have eternal death, but life.

What about you? Is it well with your soul?

Lyrics:

When peace, like a river, attendeth my way, When sorrows like sea billows roll; Whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say, It is well, it is well with my soul.

Refrain: It is well with my soul, It is well, it is well with my soul.

Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come, Let this blest assurance control, That Christ hath regarded my helpless estate, And hath shed His own blood for my soul.

My sin—oh, the bliss of this glorious thought!— My sin, not in part but the whole, Is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more, Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul!

For me, be it Christ, be it Christ hence to live: If Jordan above me shall roll, No pang shall be mine, for in death as in life Thou wilt whisper Thy peace to my soul.

But, Lord, ’tis for Thee, for Thy coming we wait, The sky, not the grave, is our goal; Oh, trump of the angel! Oh, voice of the Lord! Blessed hope, blessed rest of my soul!

And Lord, haste the day when the faith shall be sight, The clouds be rolled back as a scroll; The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend, Even so, it is well with my soul.

Click here to hear a beautiful rendition of “It is Well with My Soul” narrated by Hugh Bonneville.

Getting Along

Spoken by the man who lived his words. Without communication how can any relationship form, maintain and thrive?

Spoken by the man who lived his words. Without communication how can any relationship form, maintain and thrive?

Our church leadership group is reading a book, The Good and Beautiful Community, by James Bryan Smith. It is a book that brings together the ideas of spiritual formation and community engagement. It is thought-provoking as well as practical.

We recently discussed one of the chapters: “The Christ-Centered Community; Loving those we disagree with. What struck me was the emphasis on getting along, something that is in short supply lately. When we really stop and think about it, most times we disagree with others on non-essential issues: ideas or actions that in the long haul won’t matter. Similarly to the big Christmas argument that no one in the family quite remembers the topic. Relationships become tense and possibly broken as each side harbors hurt, wounded pride and misunderstanding. When we really get to the heart of an issue we find that we generally agree on essential fundamentals. Not all the time, of course. And recently there seems to be more and more disagreement on even the essentials of human existence.

In the application section, the author reminds us of the 18th-century Methodist leader John Wesley’s advice on loving those with whom we disagree:

  1. Treat them as companions.

  2. Do not think of speak evil of them.

  3. Pray for them.

  4. Encourage them to do good.

  5. Collaborate with them in ministry.

Granted, this is written for Christ-followers in getting along with other Christ-followers, but I think that it has universal appeal. I think that these truths apply across the board. Just because someone doesn’t have your same beliefs doesn’t mean that you cannot pray for them (or think about putting your shoes in theirs for a while). While one might not call their work, “ministry”, you can still work with others in whatever job/service they do.

Makes me wonder- what would happen if our President and Congressional members prayed for each other? Treated one another as companions? Encouraged one another? Did not speak evil of each other?And, shall we even dare say, collaborated together?

Closer to home, what about the people with whom I disagree? Some times I am so annoyed with others that I do not want to think or pray for them and I definitely do not want to encourage or collaborate with them. Although I definitely want to speak evil of them- to all who will listen! Not a very good approach to building community.

Are you currently not getting along with someone or a group of someones? Are there any of the five suggestions you can try? I am thinking of one woman in particular who drives me crazy. Perhaps I need to stop thinking (and speaking) “evil”. (Evil might be too strong a word. But I do have the tendency to speak those subtle sarcastic remarks which are not encouraging nor uplifting.)

I did hear some wise advice once: find something positive to begin and end each conversation. If only certain twits (Is that the name for people who use Twitter?) would start that practice, imagine how much our political scene would change.

What about you? How do you handle disagreements? With your family, friends or co-workers? Do you ignore them? Provoke them? Love them?

Today, how can you get along with others or help someone else get along?

Obedience

I have been thinking about obedience lately. It is one of those words like prudence and chastity that is not used much. You never hear it in wedding vows and very rarely hear it being told to children. Perhaps that is not such a bad thing but I think we may be missing an important structure in our society.

Being obedient was brought home to me the other weekend when my husband and I took our dogs to the vets for a nail trim. I was inside waiting to settle up the bill while my husband took our two scallawags outside. As he waited along the side of the building, a dog that was boarding took off from behind the vets and started running down the street with the poor vet tech chasing behind. My husband secured our dogs and went to help the tech. The dog, a young terrier mix was extremely scared but also out for a frolic along a busy intersection and road. Our vet is located on a fairly busy country road with side roads of new developments mixed with farm land. The dog ran down many of the lanes and into the fields. She then would circle back to the main road and criss cross into traffic. Try as we might, she would not come to us.

At one point I was able to “corner” her in a portion of a field that was fenced on two sides. I crouched low, kept still and called her. She finally stopped bolting and lay down about a hand’s length beyond my grasp. As I tried to hook her up to the leash, she slipped out of my grip. She bolted, then stopped, looked at me and sprinted off into some deep woods.

My husband and I helped the vet staff for about two hours stopping neighbors to tell them about the little dog. The staff continued to call and look for her far into the twilight and night. The next day we got a call from them to say that the dog continued to criss-cross over the road and wouldn’t come to them. Tragically she was hit by a car. The vets tried to save her but to no avail.

Obedience.

With our independent streaks, we are not comfortable with someone telling us what to do. We want to control our own destiny and our own way. Unfortunately we deceive ourselves if we think that we are in control: life has too many variables for us to be in charge. All we can control is our reaction to what comes down our path.

Obedience comes when we realize that someone has a better handle on what is happening: more experience, education, or understanding. It would be wise to heed their advice, listen to their commands and do what they suggest. In the case of the little terrier, had she listened to our calls, she would have been safe. She represents not only time lost for her and those spent looking for her but also a life lost.

The whole idea of listening and obedience had me thinking. In obeying are we really giving up independence? Or are we choosing to be wise by listening to others with greater wisdom? The Hebrew writer says “to obey is greater than sacrifice.” There is the expression blind obedience but I think there is blind sacrifice. Either option seems to imply that one doesn’t have a choice in the matter. One responds almost by rote. Yet I think that there are choices in both options. We can choose to obey. We can choose what and how much we sacrifice.

Whether obedience is blind or fully understood, it also requires trust in the one whom we obey. It requires that we recognize why we should and could trust that person.

In the case of obedience to God- how can we not trust Him? God is love. Pure and thoroughly. He desires the best for us because He made us. It is inconceivable that He would harm us in any way just like it is inconceivable that we would’ve harmed that little terrier.

I think of the many times I did not (and still do not at times) listen to what is good for me. I strike out on my own and don’t come back to the safety of God’s path. If only I would learn that being obedient is not an act of weakness. It is an act of being smart. I could then get over myself and my thinking that I know best. I could embrace what I, at first glance, feel is “someone telling me what to do.” I could then move on to doing the things that God is calling me to do; willingly and obediently.

What about you? How are you with obedience? Do you bristle at someone’s attempt of guiding or helping you? Do you feel like someone is trying to squash your independence? Do you welcome the guidance? Have you ever obeyed and later realized that through obedience you avoided a catastrophe? Do you truly, deep down know that God loves you and wants the best for you?

What do you choose? To obey or not to obey?

Agents of Grace

www.letterstotheexiles.com

www.letterstotheexiles.com

Last weekend my husband and I went away with another couple for a mountain retreat. We had a wonderful time- ate delicious food, did a little Scotch tasting and the best of all- engaged in deep and meaningful conversation.

While we really do not need any “starter” conversations with this couple, we did bring along a video- Letters to the Exiles, which has 7 short videos with discussion questions to ponder. The videos are so thought provoking. Partly because it has a quirky vibe to the filming: there are all sorts of gems and nuggets of hidden treasures and meanings, almost a grown-up version of “I spy”. But mostly because the content has us thinking about our faith and our purpose in the world in a different way.

One of the segments that spoke to me was about justice in the world: justice is hospitality. Justice is all about how we treat one another. “We don’t give dignity to the other person, we see the dignity inside them.” That set me back on my heels. Even though I try and not portray it, I know that when I see someone less fortunate than myself (and I realize that even using that term “less fortunate than myself” exemplifies the issue) I am thinking, “poor such and such.” My reaction may not be through eyes of compassion but through eyes of comparison: they are less than me- whether the comparison is emotional, physical, or spiritual. Yet for me to be a part of justice in the world, I need to see each and every person with the dignity he deserves because we all are made in God’s image.

When I do so, I see the frailty, humanity, and the potential. I also recognize the log in my own eye. It is when I remove it that I begin to see people as God sees them. I am moved towards compassion and understanding and away from comparison and pride.

I wonder if we truly grasped that concept, where would the hatred and misunderstanding go?

After the Pittsburgh shooting this weekend, I heard someone talk about people coming together to push back those deviants to the basements and their lonely lives. I certainly understand the sentiment. However, I think that would only keep the hatred bubbling up. Jesus called us to pray for those who persecute us and I believe that it is only through God’s power that we can. Anything short of prayer is just simmering hatred.

I am looking forward to watching the movie “The Best of Enemies” when it is released next year. Watch the trailer here. The movie tells “the true story of the unlikely relationship between Ann Atwater, an outspoken civil rights activist, and C.P. Ellis, a local Ku Klux Klan leader. During the racially charged summer of 1971, Atwater and Ellis come together to co-chair a community summit on the desegregation of schools in Durham, N.C.” What is somewhat alluded to in the trailer is the faith of the woman. I am sure that the change in Ellis was due to the many prayers that Atwater and her fellow congregants lifted. His heart change is nothing less than a miracle.

What about you? Have you seen any videos or read any books that have been thought provoking for you? What was your reaction to the shootings of this past week? As I write this, there are too many recent shootings to mention in addition to the PA one. That fact alone should cause us to pause and take a long look at where we are headed as a society.

In the Letters to the Exiles, it reminds us that, as followers of Christ we might live in this world but we are not of it. We are to be agents of God’s grace in a broken world. A daunting task in today’s society but necessary if we are to survive one another.



The Temper Temperer

It is that time of year when we seem to receive all sorts of catalogues that cater to the whims of those looking for presents for the people who have everything.

For some reason we received the Hammacher Schlemmer Catalogue- “Guaranteeing the Best, the Only and the Unexpected for 170 years.” There is nothing for sale that I nor anyone that I know really needs, yet I still find myself perusing the pages, seeing the merchandise and thinking “that item would be interesting for ….”

IMG_0493.jpg

What made me chuckle was the following:

The Temper Temperer: This is the personal voice muffler that stifles expressive outbursts resulting form the workplace, politics, or a sports team’s performance. Held in place over the mouth or secured behind the head via an adjustable elastic strap, the muffler provides relief from inveterate cursing at a television as well as channeled stress release after a rough day at the office when a pillow in not available. Its sound-dampening quality also makes it ideal for impromptu close-quarters usage during family gatherings when privacy is limited. One size fits all mouths. $49.99

(I wonder if they have something to prevent one’s thumbs from tweeting? - Just a thought….)

While this is humorous it does make me think of a serious matter. Being an adult and part of a civilized society doesn’t absolve someone from actually having self-control. This gadget insists that instead of controlling one’s tongue, you just need to put on your voice muffler.

Being called “a spitfire” as a child, I get it. There were many times in my childhood and youth that I could’ve used the muffler. It certainly would have avoided conflict, hurt feelings, broken relationships and my own punishments.

Hopefully I have learned and improved a little as I have aged. Taming one’s tongue is something that may get better with maturity but always needs to be in check. If not, it can create discord, chaos, broken relationships and at the extreme- destruction.

But I know that one of the promises from God is that He has sent a helper to us (Holy Spirit) that as we grow to be more and more like Him, we demonstrate love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. For as much as we are in need of civility and manners, the true caring of one another cannot be done without God’s help.

In thinking over this past week’s news and the treatment of men and women, it occurs to me that if people, beginning at an early age, treat one another like they want to be treated (or how they would want a loved one treated), maybe some of this miscommunication and hurt can be avoided.

There is a reason that manners have prevailed ever since there was more than one person living in community. Manners are more than pinky-in-the-air hoity-toity-ness: at the core, manners are actions derived from thinking of other people first.

I know that I need the Helper in learning self-control and manners. Left to my own devices I would be (and am) incredibly selfish- saying whatever I want, doing whatever felt good, to whomever regardless of their feelings. I need help in being disciplined in mind, body and spirit. That discipline doesn’t necessarily mean in a punitive way but in a manner that puts me on a different path- the path to caring for one another in love. I find that I have to daily (sometimes minute-by minute) ask God for help in the moments: how to respond appropriately to an awkward conversation, what insights do I need to work with a difficult colleague, how to remain focused on the task at hand, what ways should I do to stay faithful to a goal I want to achieve, when I should speak and when do I need to listen? I find that the more I ask and stay “in touch” with God, the more He changes my mind and attitude so that I am more loving and caring for those around me.

What about you? What gets you riled up? Have you ever had consequences to your outbursts? What were they?

How is your self-control? What strategies do you do to maintain it?

How are your manners? Need a tune-up or is it automatic? How are you in putting others’ needs before yours? Are you balanced with that: not bulldozing your needs over everyone else, nor piling on everyone else’s needs so that you are immobile?

Fortunate for our wallets (not so fortunate for the catalogue company) we have a free and natural temper temperer: the Holy Spirit. It’s the original model and fits great. Guaranteed.